1200
627
Written by Jo Bryant
The English Manner, The UK’s Leading Etiquette and Protocol Training Institute
310
310
Read it in 3 minutes
Described by The Telegraph as ‘the empress of etiquette’, Jo joined The English Manner in 2019 from Debrett’s, where she spent over a decade as a tutor and the editor of more than fifteen acclaimed books on etiquette and modern manners.
Connect with Jo Bryant on LinkedIn Follow Jo Bryant on Instagram18 December 2025
Being a guest in someone else’s home for Christmas can test everyone’s etiquette (and patience), even of you know them well. Accept that every household has their own way of doing Christmas, and remember to mind your festive manners.
Speak to your hosts well in advance and ask them if there is anything you can bring. Real contributions to the festivities are usually more welcome at this time of year than the usual host gifts.
Some households dress up for Christmas Day, while others keep it casual, so check in advance. It’s wise to find out what you might be doing – country walks, a smarter restaurant – and to pack accordingly.
Whether it’s friends or family, offer to help, but don’t get in the way. It’s best to lend a hand with simple food prep and clearing up, rather than advising on turkey timings and stuffing recipes.
It’s essential to conform to the culture of the host’s house. Whether it’s playing board games, a post-lunch walk or a Christmas film, it’s good manners to muck in.
Find out who else is going to be joining in for Christmas Day, and make sure you take presents for everyone. If in doubt, wrap up a box of chocolates or two as reserve gifts for surprise guests.
Most of us enjoy a Christmas cocktail or two, but pace yourself and know when to stop. Keep an eye on fellow guests’ intake and make sure you aren’t the heaviest drinker in the house.
Keep your handset on silent to avoid disturbing others, and don’t bring your phone to the Christmas table. Remember to be present and social – being glued to your screen isn’t very festive.
Whether it’s children’s routines colliding or a different running order for Christmas Day, remember that each household does things their own way. As a guest, you need to try to go with the flow and fit in.
Keep your bedroom clean and neat (make the bed, open the curtains, hang up your towel), and don’t hog the bathroom. Take dirty cups and glasses through to the kitchen, and tidy up after your children.
It’s good manners to say thank you to your hosts afterwards; the best way is to send a handwritten letter or card. Even if you had the Christmas of horrors, put pen to paper – and make a mental note to have different plans next year.
Whether you wish to gain some social polish or some added confidence for your professional life, you’re always welcome at The English Manner, online or in person.
